Secret Skills

You never see birds doing great big loop-the-loops in the sky, do you?

I'm sure if they have the capability to fly then they must be able to manage it with a bit of practice.

But you never see them even try, what a waste of talent!

I suspect, however, that they can.

I bet that as soon as my head hits the pillow, under the shroud of night, there are scores of blokey birds (y'know, the confident type) showing off to lady birds their soaring loop-the-loops; doing a bit of low-to-the-pavement flying; and maybe even some upside-down stuff.

Then, when I wake up in the morning it all stops, in case I get excited by it all and try to catch one of these winged fellows and keep him for a pet, or for my very bird circus show.

I get the same feeling when I watch Coventry play.

I suspect that a player like Jay Tabb for instance, probably has the capability to go on a mazy run past four dumbfounded defenders before thunking the ball in to the top corner.

Maybe he does in behind-closed-doors training sessions when everyone's back is turned. Because in matches these days he does so many backward passes that sometimes I wonder if he knows which way he's supposed to be shooting!

Take Marcus Hall, for example. Watch him warm up before a game and you'll catch glimpses of some deft touches and silky skills. See him in a match and he can't get rid of the ball quick enough! Like it's one of those games with a water-balloon inside that's gonna burst any second and make him all wet and embarrassed.

I don't mean to pick on Jay and Marcus. They're two of my favourite players, which is probably why I watch them - like I watch birds - with that fascination for what might be.

Here's an idea: next home game, why don't we all cover our eyes and promise not to peek. Then the players won't feel all self-conscious and nervous and might feel able to show off their skills a bit.

Who knows, Clinton might even score a goal?

We'll miss it all, of course, but it's okay, we can watch it on TV later. Just don't tell the players it's on...